I am literally pissed off. This old friend of mine that I decided to move to Edmonton with at a time in which I was just starting my own life, I had a call with after leaving the hospital today.
I by way of a friend in an orderly manner tried to get my belongings back, I had left off with the understanding that we both came to agreements. I don’t trust some people that much and with Gary. He got to be accepted in to an area that is similar to air traffic controlling. I have placed him off my phone and so on and today I called him as I am not sure where and what took place between another friend of mine in order to get my clothes and my desk and so on all back to me.
I had sent him long ago keys to the house as well as everything that he needed and I know at this time I am not sure what he has done to it. I am waiting for a call from a friend of mine that decided to go in and get my belongings and then I would arrange for my things to be sent to me. All being said I have been left out of the ball park and I decided in a manner to see where there where at – Pat was off for the day and so I called directly to Gary. I greeted him with a “hello how are you doing”, and you could see that he once again was drinking on a day of. So I left it be and told him that I would call him back later at a better time. Well he went livid and then hung up the phone.
I have over $ 4,000.00 dollars of my belongings there and if you were in my place what would you do? I thought by now at this time that all things would have been arranged and would have been compliant but I have no clue as to where he is at – accept that he was going to be going through a divorce, during the time I walked into this situation and I do wish I would have not moved in with him and thereafter taken of a house, I am clear of the house but I am not sure if I should place a lean on the house as all my clothes are there, from things that go way back for me as well as commodities that are precious.
I really do have a question for each and everyone as I left there with a discussion with him and all was well. But what came out of it was entirely different. I wish to get my things back but at the same time I don’t want it to come to being something very immature – as in a fight. Gary seemed to become a very angry man during his walk out of his wife and child. I walked into a situation and there after I knew that with all that he was doing was not the same person I once knew.
I am literally pissed off. This old friend of mine that I decided to move to Edmonton with at a time in which I was just starting my own life, I had a call with after leaving the hospital today. I bye way of a friend in an orderly manner tried to get my belongings back, I had left off with the understanding that we both came to agreements. I don’t trust some people that much and with Gary. He got to be accepted in to an area that is similar to air traffic controlling. I have placed him off my phone and so on and today I called him as I am not sure where and what took place between another friend of mine in order to get my clothes and my desk and so on all back to me.
I had sent him long ago keys to the house as well as everything that he needed and I know at this time I am not sure what he has done to it. I am waiting for a call from a friend of mine that decided to go in and get my belongings and then I would arrange for my things to be sent to me. All being said I have been left out of the ball park and I decided in a manner to see where there where at – Pat was off for the day and so I called directly to Gary. I greeted him with a “hello how are you doing”, and you could see that he once again was drinking on a day of. So I left it be and told him that I would call him back later at a better time. Well he went livid and then hung up the phone.
I have over $ 4,000.00 dollars of my belongings there and if you were in my place what would you do? I thought by now at this time that all things would have been arranged and would have been compliant but I have no clue as to where he is at – accept that he was going to be going through a divorce, during the time I walked into this situation and I do wish I would have not moved in with him and thereafter taken of a house, I am clear of the house but I am not sure if I should place a lean on the house as all my clothes are there, from things that go way back for me as well as commodities that are precious.
I really do have a question for each and everyone as I left there with a discussion with him and all was well. But what came out of it was entirely different. I wish to get my things back but at the same time I don’t want it to come to being something very immature – as in a fight. Gary seemed to become a very angry man during his walk out of his wife and child. I walked into a situation and there after I knew that with all that he was doing was not the same person I once knew.
Do I just leave it be? Or what would you do to get your belongings back as I have medical matters at hand and I am really on my own with this one. I called on of two friends that while I was heading South today and just arriving in I really know that this is something that I have no one to figure this one out with - maybe I should leave it all be and all my clothes and belonging I will just forget about.
In calling the guy, it nothing had changed and you could hear the anger in his voice, so I just told him that "Gary for today I will leave this be take care", he hung up before I finished off. One side of me says place a lien on the house the other says that he is a friend that I have know since I was 17. But it's time for Jack to think about what is most important to himself - me that is.
I have all my clothes there, two desks bought new, one couch as well as improvements that I made that needless to say I did not have to do at the time. So if you factor all things in what would you do?
Note he is six hours away from me...In some ways I literally with all that has happened could and would kick his ass. But at this age you don't do things in that way.
I look forward - I do to your own independant recommendations of what you would do in such a case as I called one good friend and he is here in the same city and works within corrections and well he is married and ironically he has prevailed with his wife and children.
A long story short I moved as I was amidst a old friend that became a drunk I know this goes with divorce sometimes - but I was the one he wanted near him as he thought that I was there to fix his problems, and I choose to stay out of the situation. I have never wrote this but after most all things have been done now with the house, he seemingly seems to be the same. However that all being said, he has much of my belongings in a city that has gone into a large recession, as for him, I don't care where or what happens - but I do have valuables that are there.
I sincerely do wish to get your own viewpoints on this....
At this point, Jack, I would drive to Edmonton, look into the matter personally and if I could, ship my stuff to Saskatoon or at least grab the small important things - get some closure.
ReplyDeleteWrenny I have no keys as I sent them to him...I have no way in getting back in. That was our agreement. Then after I had done things with the bank and he took onus in keeping it and the house now is entirely his. I don't have that option.
ReplyDeleteIts your stuff and you should get it back. However if its nothing of extreme sentimental value then don't worry about it. There is the principle of the matter of its your stuff and you want it back however if you expend more energy on it than its worth then just drop it. Just a thought.
ReplyDeleteThis sounds like a plan. But if the age thing is getting in the way, in about a year you'll be older and that age should do the trick.
ReplyDelete;o)
You are able to figure this out. Have a talk with yourself.
1. Is the friendship worth the effort; either way.
2. Is the stuff worth the effort.
3. Is there contradictory principles at work here, and if so, which weighs heaviest with you?
Answer these and the rest will come to you.
well, i would go along to the house and see him, what else can you do other than that , is it all worth it, i say if he is a loyal friend then he will let you have your belongings back at some point .Rosie
ReplyDeleterent a UHaul and have the local police meet you there, call them first of course and see if that is an option
ReplyDeleteSet real priorities about the value of the possessions still there. Is the "stuff" really that important? ...Worth any unpleasant confrontations that might be necessary to reclaim it? If so--then I'd contact authorities in Edmondton and go and fetch it myself---with a U-Haul and police escort (as poetessgarden suggests.)
ReplyDeleteIF NOT, then I'd chalk it up to a major life lesson---estimate the value of it, add it on my tax return and write it off (literally and emotionally) as a major loss.
Do you have Income Tax in Canada? LOL
Good thought there Tony...it may be the way I go with this.
ReplyDeleteNo a friend at all and loyal that is not within his ways apparently as at this time Rosie, he would not nor I too see each other again. I wrote about this earlier and I gave it some time but now with all of this - I think his wife was right and my brother wished not to be involved with him nor I - I think it's time to just let it go and let him winder in his own self indulged dynamic.
ReplyDeleteThat probably is the only choice I have as I know two that are there in the forces and I thought today might be something much different but I am going to think this one over as taking legal measures is probably the only option.
ReplyDeleteSusan yes we have Income tax here.
ReplyDeleteWith everything right now going the way it has within family matters, I took a stab at the idea of what was the case and I will know what to do come the weekend. It's a loss and unwarranted one.
I hope you find the solution ... sometimes things are just better left the way they are.
ReplyDeleteMaterial things can be replaced so If I were you I would just turn the page of that story and write a new one with new things in it, new everything.
Kisses Babs ♥ ♥ ♥
I would ask him one more time nicely and then if that does not work then warn him of your next step which should be to take the police with you and gather your things.
ReplyDeleteOh the solution will come I did not expect this today but I got on here and vented it out as I wanted to see the variable thoughts as I know what I will do and I am not throttled by it, I just know that there is a simple answer to many things and this felt like it was so heavy but really from others you get the varying thoughts for me it comes to be something that is a gain as I too - do quandary things now and then and this one came by surprise - but I will deal with it in due time.
ReplyDeleteHugs back to you Babs...
Danni, I am going to leave it be and in one week see where things stand, but he shall keep the distance. As it's just not worth the effort, I knew this all back a few months ago and thought things had subsided but obviously not. He was an arrogant SOB, and I am going to leave it at that.
ReplyDeleteI agree about talking to the police about it. It's on record that you were living there and they should be able to help you get your things. Happens all the time when other relationships break up or divorce. Hope you are feeling less stressed, it's disappointing that he is being such a jerk.
ReplyDeleteGood luck, Jack---you'll make a smart decision, I'm sure.
ReplyDeleteMy Grandmother used to have a saying, "Don't borrow trouble, enough comes through the front door." I always use that as benchmark when considering such matters... Try not to let this get under your skin too deeply?
THOSE sorts are usually best left at a great distance!
ReplyDeleteLyn,
ReplyDeleteI am chalking this up to some other time, I feel much less stressed than this time of the years last year and with this I am just going to leave it where it is as his ex if she is now is or was probably right on him. However yeah there is a word for him and it's jerk. The games that people will play is beyond me.
Jack, do what you feel honestly you should do... and do it without being pissed off at how you have been treated. Everyone has really bad days and it might not be you that he is having difficulties with ... just taking it out on you! It's not a good thing to do that... and I don't suggest any excuses for him but if he is your friend of 17 years.... then there is more obviously going on with him that meets the eye. So... follow your heart... and it will all work out just fine!! :)
ReplyDeleteI'd try calling him again, and if he puts the phone down on you .... I would take the matter to the small-claims court !
ReplyDeleteLots of good advice offered here on your blog. I would call him again to ask him for your valuables , see how his attitude was and then make your decision to follow through or chalk it up as an expensive lesson .Sounds like he's burned his bridges.
ReplyDeleteYeah I can see that and I have not been on here for family reasons but thanks - it's it good advice....
ReplyDeleteThe belogings were all trashed so I have some person matters that far out weigh this at this point....