A good friend of mine, Pat had come to the city as he had a convention that he had to attend. He arrived on Friday and left today. His primary reason for coming was attending a convention that he does two times a year in this city. As well, his intention if it could take place was in meeting up with his former wife Brenda. I actually knew both of them was there his best man. The brunch was good, I was in a part of the city that I recall from years ago, but I am still learning my way around this city.
I have had a few situations that have come about and in the midst of it – it’s very nice to have this time out where you could enjoy the time together and then. Brenda is the person that had a partial operation as mentioned in my earlier post.
It never occurred to me that Pat and Brenda had never seen each other in all this time and than I had. Actually Pat had called me long distance to place me in contact with Brenda. Years had gone by but the natural person had not.
After we left, I know that Pat was thinking several things. I admire both of them that after some 10 years if not more they could both look each other in the eyes and laugh and no snide remarks – it was all good. We spoke later by way of telephone while he was on his way back to his city where he lives. As he is married and has children and is a devote man as is Brenda with her new husband of five years.
A friend is one that can the same person rather than change to fit the occasions if you know what I mean. I think that it's something to do with being honest with your self. Just maybe. I have found that over the years that the people that are themselves and don’t have to place on an act are the ones that seemingly keep in contact with many of their friends from the past. Pat is definitely proof of that. As was Brenda. I am not sure how many could do something like that and it will be taking place again between them - but it's a very different to what I have seen.
A Great week to ya...
True friends are always there and never change. I have some with whom I have kept contact since our first years of primary school, that is about 40 years ago, when we used to exchange our school bags before getting off the bus so our parents would have to drive to the friend's house to pick the right bag... Unfortunately, they soon have found the pot aux roses, as we could not fool them for very long... heehee. After that, they found a way to keep us happy by inviting the friend to sleep over once in a while. Those were good years I still remember very vividly. So yes, it can happen, and it is good to see those friends again after many years. For couples to be friends I think is also possible as I have written about it on my blog a few times, be it if nothing else, a matter of respect for what has been for I think that if you have loved a person, that love cannot simply vanish without a trace, it would be denying feelings you have had as they where real then.
ReplyDeleteHow nice that you were reunited with your friends and had a wonderful time. I still have friends that I keep in contact with that I have know since my late teens. Because of family responsibilities, we don't get to meet very often but when we do it's always a pleasant event. None of them have changed much over the years (I don't mean physically, but in personality).
ReplyDeleteIt is a sign of great maturity when ex-spouses can meet and have a meal together and remain civil to one another. That's the way my brother-in-law and his ex-wife are toward each other and it is the same for my brother and his ex-wife. My brother-in-law and his ex-wife have always kept in contact and have even traveled together since their divorce. Maybe they were meant to be good friends rather than spouses.
My ex husband and I have this kind of continued closeness even though we are both in new relationships. I feel blessed that we had the ability to remain as friends when our marraige was not healthy for any of us. Good friends are hard to come by, keeping them is worth all.
ReplyDeleteTruly that does some up what I was thinking to be able to meet and have things on the base is something that is definately a sign of moving on.
ReplyDeleteKudos to you this some are able to do as such and some are not however for those that can I think that it's a great thing as each are able to live in a manner the has worth.
ReplyDeleteFriends as well as a relationship have re unions as I did. However I think it all is with a regards to respect as well as not only understanding one's own self but a respect with regards to the other. Relationships - Respect maybe it all leads to something...
ReplyDeleteG'day Jack,
ReplyDeleteI have found along this journey that I have more divorced friends that remain friends with their ex partners than the opposite, especially if there are children concerned,whether this is all show for the outside world or not I don't question, but I often wonder because the other end of the scale mainly consist of family members, and as we are privy to the more intimate facts of the situation they don't seem to worry about sharing their warring fractions, As to old friends I am attending a luncheon with woman I was involved with in a sporting team over 45 years ago, we do this every few months & it is amazing that the personalities are the same now as they were then, even with a lifetime having been lived in the interim,
Staying friends with ex's is possible if both parties are mature enough.
ReplyDelete