Monday, April 30, 2012

There are Things within Life

Which one doesnt have control. This I do know with my father as I had seen him today but just for a small amount of time. He said a few decent things and one could really fall into a depression. Over the weekend I talked with my brother as well with my cousin. Yet it's not easy but what does one say within this stage of the game but to accept things.

Of course I have had a weekend of over thinking and what I had done was got on the phone and called my two cousins and still I think that no one really knows what it's like to have a revolving door where at any given time my father could very well be gone. For myself it has been rough. And within this time where I am doing what I have set out to do the one fear what that my father and myself would leave on a bad note.

I left early this morning and was back at 2pm. I do thank you for your kind remarks within a trying time. The main concern medically with my father is he is a stage 4 non hodgkins survivor of 12 years with an abnormal auto immune system which within the last two years I knew full well that at some point in time he would have some situation - yet who knows where it goes - I am glad I met with him as well I am not going to get all down. There is nothing romantic about areas like this and I never assume anything and hope for the best.

The best thing for myself at this point is to keep busy and allow that time where one can take there mind of areas such as this.

 

16 comments:

  1. Sounds like you aren't going to get what you really want from your Dad, so kill him with kindness, you will feel better.
    Keep busy... have you ever tried meditating, to relax and empty your mind?

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  2. I have obtained within my youth what has been a great father and thus is life.

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  3. Best wishes to you Jack in dealing with this.

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  4. I lost my father in 2000. But it's my grandson's situation that comes to mind. He was only 24 - long estranged from his father, partly due to divorce. He spent a lot of time with his dad during the last month of his life and still feel today that the time (and forgiveness) was well spent. It is hard, no doubt about it. Yet, so very worthwhile in time to come. Prayed for both of you.

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  5. I have had a tremendous life with my father and have seen helped him during the duration of most all of his situations with health. I am glad I went to see him and then come back I have been doing fine with the exception of recent as I have not been on here much. I do hope of course things go well, all of us my family does.
    I just really go with the flow now. At times such as these I find that there is a close bond which comes out and
    is shared - which was today. That is worth more than money - as I believe in honoring and the relations with the
    one whom granted me a means yet allowed me to go my own way.

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  6. A good father is really a blessing, Jack. No matter how much time you have together, and I hope it will be a longer time, it sounds to me from your writing that your dad will always have someone who will carry the best in him through life.

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  7. .lifes challenges can be hard..[hugs]]

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  8. Live each day as it was your last day, enjoy everything, who can really know what will be our tomorrow or if we'll have one? Let life goes.....anywhere it'll take you. I wish the best for you and your family, my dear Jack.

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  9. Sounds like a lot to deal with. Hope you can hold up and carry on.

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  10. I had my three teeth done after and there are times Doug where one should hold off as I was literally exhausted.

    I am prepared and
    have been when and if my father goes. There were many things which he taught me mind you he inspired me in my youth, he gave
    myself and my brother the opportunity to be in Royal Roads as it would have been paid for - yet neither of us took it. And as ironic as
    it is of what you say here Doug.....he was whispering to me almost these thoughts. Oh boy. Doug I just logged on and you certainly
    have placed it well. Yet we all are praying that this man does not pass on yet - probably myself the most. As I am doing something
    within my medical and I wish to have the opportunity to conclude our relationship.

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  11. This has been a challenge Caroline - yet in more ways than one as you know.

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  12. It's not about being proud nor being depressed - Ruth, the last few days have been rather hard.
    But I do believe that one can carry on this has been a challenge but I don't know how to say
    that there are good days to come. Nothing in life is perfect but you work with it. I can hold up
    I have with my ambitions to get off a unnessary medication and I can attest without being
    proud that I do. Yet this is a challenge and one can not predict how things go with my father
    but I have always been my own person. I really am in lack of words. But thank you.

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