Shifts of Life

Yes there was a time that I started computing and went onto Yahoo.  I had literally never been on yahoo for two years and it was all new to me and I would chat and I found so many things amazing with it.

I didn’t do anything but chat for an hour or two and then I met someone.  Still to this day with a few people I am asked about her online and offline -  and I don’t know where she is. 

 

She was someone that was from Argentina and had gone through some turmoil in life.  Ironically she started talking to me and there after we would call.  She was a very interesting person, and we broke the barriers of countries.

I had sent her a few things to make way during difficult times and at first it was a very kind and mature connect that came to be something that I was introduced to her brother and her son and daughter.  I came to learn so much of Argentina that I have a friend that is leaving to go there in August.  Meanwhile I don’t know where she is but she was a lady that was one that definitely was spiritual.  While at the same time she was a trooper in the manner that she could be a mother while being left with only enough money to take care of her two children.  It probably was an experience that I won’t forget.  She would call me and I would call her and there was no way that I was going to be able to bring here out of Argentina.  In fact I was supposed to attend a wedding and I couldn’t go. 

Time passed and that was a learned lesson.  And I remember the last time that I had heard from her was nearly one year ago now.  I see and do this in a much different manner in comparison to then.  But what I find is that there are things in life that we do let go.  Or they let go.  As far as I know she is either married in the United States or is still in Argentina.  I guess my point here is that within life we will have some of the closest people come and go.  The most important thing for myself is the balance of life.  And what I am doing.  I never took one person for granted.  And I hope she is doing well.  I am certain that she would be proud of what I have done since I returned from NY to Canada – as mentioned that was a trying time.  We made promises and we were very close but I am sure there are good recollections for both of us.  Love I think the hardest thing in today's time is people meeting people at that certain stage in life.  Some are confirmed bachelors, some are pleased to be single - as they just wish to live life and are so used to doing the same routine.  Women seem to take it much easier I believe in comparison to men.  Most men are not that expressive.  And the ideals and traditions in which one has treats meeting the opposite sex are different for each person.  I myself should have been born back in the 1930’s, as I am a tad traditional.  For myself, I am not sure if I do wish for love in a relationship of marriage again - or at least not yet.  But friendships are a foundation to what love is all about.  I can speak from experience that after a year of marriage, it comes down to a union of friendship - love that is.

I have some saved discs that contain things that when I open them up you can measure how things have progressed in life.  I think we all wish to progress.  I do, I am not the same man that I was five years ago, I certainly am a gent that has taken life and progressed with it.  I will say that as I literally did and have been there where I came out of a situation - and now "I am", rather than "where am I”.  Nor am I the same man that I was five years ago.

Less hair, a few wrinkles here and there and when I go to grow a beard now it comes out white.  No perfecto est. perfecto.  Once I did feel like half a man, now I feel like what I was writing on another platform that I had.  Sometimes we all have loss, but we do have gains.  And I find that I did or was sitting on that corner watching the world go by until I took on a challenge.  If you look back in the last 5 years of your life – you see it all for what it’s was.  Looking ahead into the future I know what is.  When you have been through any situation in life – you gain a greater understanding of where you wish to go in the future.  For myself I find that I have made the greatest gains within the entire time of my life thus far as I have thrived in doing.  By no means do I think I am perfect, I just know what I can do, and what I can’t do in life.  Meaning there are things that are realistic and risky.  But you take on the challenge (regardless of what it is) and handle it in a mature manner.  I am not 21, and I am not going back in time.  I am right here in the "Now".  Some have the hardest times with second chances in life.  But when you do have that chance and bite into it - don’t go back - keep forging ahead - it becomes less hard to do and becomes natural.  I think it may be due to the reason that they never let go of the past.  And I don’t think we have to let go, we can appreciate what was and look forward to what can be.  These glasses I found and I took them into get fixed as the lenses fell out one year ago.  An eyewear store here said that they couldn’t replace them as they are not in style and they don’t carry the lenses.  Symbolically that tells me that everything changes, and I have tucked them away.  What is today isn’t yesterday.  Paul McCartney wrote great lyrics while being a young man on growing old.  I wonder if he would be able to write those same lyrics at his age now.  Probably yes, but it would be from a different mindset.

I think we all gain in a manner that we look and make those choices that we deem are fit and suitable for ourselves.  When we do that – we can then gain in what we have with future goals.  A little perspective here I guess on love, life, and age.  Most important to me is being who I am.  And understanding what my areas of abundance are, as well as what I wish to gain in my life cycle. That’s my dynamic.

 

 

Note that this picture is from "yester year", but I can see clearly now.

Attachment: The Beatles - Its Getting Better All The Time.mp3